Motherhood Has Taught Me How To Have A Good Time

There are some things I took for granted before I had kids. There for some things that I just thought were down right boring. Sometimes both of these ideas were for the same thing. Now I am a mom. I have three beautiful children. My toddler, the smallest has enough energy for 10 toddlers and hates sleep. And my two boys, they think its cool when they wake up before the sun. Oh the fun we have around here!

Blame it on being in my 30s now. Blame it on motherhood. Blame it on being completely worn out that my body screams in pain some days. But there are now things in my life that I absolutely love, that my previous self found down right boring.

So here is a list of things that I find totally lovely and wonderful. I would love to experience any one of these things on any given day.


1. Being able to drink a full cup of tea/coffee in one sitting while it is still hot.

2. Eating a meal without getting up, breaking up a sibling argument or being grossed out by the conversation my boys have. Seriously some things just do not need to be talked about during dinner.

3. Having a shower alone. Or even better yet a bath. Especially during school holidays I would really like that time alone.

4. That extremely rare feeling when ALL the laundry is done. Like I said it is extremely rare and only lasts about three seconds. Cherish it when it happens!

5. Going to bed early, bonus points if I am alone. Which now that I have a toddler that co-sleeps… that would be a never one this.

6. The ability to watch a whole movie in one sitting. Seriously. I miss this. It now takes me about 3-4 nights to watch a movie. Especially if the movie can’t be watched around children.

7. Working out. Oh how I used to take the fact that I could workout without being interrupted for granted. Or even have the time for it without having to put something else off till later.

8. Going to the store alone and getting items that were needed and without a meltdown from someone (sometimes even me!). Especially grocery shopping. Never, EVER, take three kids to the grocery store when they are hungry. Especially a toddler. Nightmare.

9. Talking to another adult without having to spell out words or read lips. Seriously. Simple conversation.

10. Talking on the phone. Ok, this one I can do without, I don’t actually like talking on the phone. In fact I hate it. But sometimes it has to get done, like calling doctors offices and such. Somehow my kids always time their meltdowns or fights for the exact moment that I get on the phone.

11. Eating candy / ice cream without sharing. Seriously. Its MY chocolate bar!

12. Having an afternoon nap. Or sleeping in. Or sleeping all night. I miss sleep.

13. Reading a book. Within a decent amount of time so I don’t have to go back and restart it because I forgot the beginning already.

Any one of these things would make me super happy. Combine a couple of them and I would be on cloud nine.

What things do you find totally enjoyable that others may find boring?

~ Michelle

Inspired By Five

I thought that being a mom would be the scariest thing I ever did. And it is. It scares the sh!t out of me almost daily. But there is something else in life that I never thought would be scary and it ended up being so scary that it held me back for YEARS! Wonder what could possible have that much power over a person, well I will tell you: Following my dreams. Seriously. I’m not kidding.

Ever since I was a little girl I have had an obsession with designing and creating. Anything from clothes, crafts, houses at one point, but mostly, always, jewelry. I used to have notebook upon notebook filled with drawers.

Then I met my husband, then we had 2 kids in 13 months. Then I started Sugarplum And Applesauce. Like I said I have always loved to create and design. I’ve always loved fabrics. The different colours, textures, all of that. But still my first passion was always jewelry. But I held back. Why? Because it absolutely, without a doubt, right down to my bone, scared me.

I have held off on my dream for years. Far longer than I should have. But then I suffered a miscarriage, then I had a high risk pregnancy. Then I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. My family was finally complete. Those events changed me. Changed me to my core. Finally having my whole family here supporting me and encouraging me finally gave me the strength to push forward. To take the leap. To jump in. Whatever phrase you want to call it.

And thus, Inspire By Five was born. You can also find me on Instagram  and Twitter.

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Now that it is here, I am still scared out of my mind about it! I haven’t fully launched it yet. But still, it is out there. Out there for the whole world to see. I feel like not only am I showing people a piece of jewelry I created, but a piece of my soul. And that thought terrifies me.

I hope you will join me on this adventure as I turn my dream into a reality.

And if you have a dream, I hope you find the strength to follow it! Don’t wait! Jump in now! When you do, I will be here to cheer you on to and encourage you!

~ Michelle

Countdown To Back To School

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It’s summer. A time when everyone expects moms to jump up and down for joy because their darling children will be home 24/7 for what can sometimes feel like forever…

Don’t get me wrong, I love summer vacation. But I miss the structure that the school year brings. All the hard work we as a family have put into our routine, our schedule, it is all thrown right out the window in the summer.

I plan and plan for summer vacation, to the point that I’m tired and left feeling drained. Then summer vacation happens, and 75% of those plans go out the window. Every year. Every single year. Which just leaves me feeling somewhat disappointed that all that effort and time was wasted.

Then there is the dreaded “I’m bored” from the kids, or the sibling fighting. Fighting over nothing. “Mom I think he looked at me all weird like!” Seriously kid?!

Oh how I have a love/hate relationship with summer vacation. I like the relaxing mornings compared to the rush of getting to school. But I still have to get my kids up and fed, clean up after them, feed the again and again and again, because they have apparently never eaten before and must eat all day long during the summer.

Summer vacation is far from relaxing when you are a mom. I have 3 kids, and so far summer vacation has consisted of breaking up fights, dealing with the I’m bored, going on adventures only to have them fight in the car, dealing with the constant parade through my kitchen, the endless toys and mess inside and outside my house. Its not as simple as checking the living room for toys before bed, I have to check outside too now.

I miss my kids when they are in school, I honestly do. But right now, school is looking pretty good.

Maybe its because I am such an introvert, that I feel most comfortable when things are done a certain way, and I just find all this more draining than other moms do. Maybe its because I haven’t slept properly since my daughter was born. Maybe its the not having a single moment to myself thing. The lack of adult conversation. Maybe its the feeling so alone in the summer when its just me and the kids day in and day out.

Blame it on what you want.

As much as I love my kids, love the extra time with them, love the extra cuddles, love the extra talks, as much as I love being able to go on adventures and spend so much time with them. As much fun as we have already had, and will have, I am counting down to the first day of school! (Which of course I will cry over. Don’t judge!)

Do you feel the same way? How do you deal with summer vacation with kids?

~Michelle

 

Talking To My Kids About Adoption

Something was brought to my attention and I felt the need to write this down. I am adopted, and I am a birth mom. There is no denying or hiding it. Its a major part of me. And really it is something I would never try to hide or deny. There is no shame in adoption, in being in any part of adoption. And there is also the  minor detail about having an adoption tattoo on my arm in plain sight that I show off proudly.

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Growing up I don’t remember any single moment that I was told I was adopted. It was a simple fact that I grew up with. When I placed my son for adoption I knew without a doubt that any future children I had would grow up knowing all about him. Fast forward 3 children later and they all know about him. My daughter is only 2, but she has spent every summer of her life with him, and sees him on FaceTime, and sees his pictures around the house. She may not understand, but she knows he’s her brother.

No, telling my children that they have an older sibling that was placed for adoption did not hurt them, or scar them in any way. No I did not tell them “too soon”. Well unless you mean I talked about their older brother even before they could talk, then sure, maybe it was “too soon” as they couldn’t talk about it and join in the conversation.

My children have grown up with the fact that they have an older brother. Being that my oldest son was placed into an open adoption. My oldest son was able to meet my 3 younger children all before they were 6 months old and been able to visit them every few years.

Adoption isn’t something to be hidden away, kept in secret, only talked about in dark corners in the middle of the night in whispers.

I am adopted. I am a birth mom. Why should my children grow up not knowing these things?

Yes, my children miss their older brother. Yes, I miss him. Yes, it hurts me to know they miss him. Yes, I have answered many, many, many questions over the years and will probably continue to do so. Yes it is hard, some days harder than others. Yes, we have all cried countless tears. Is it worth it? Yes. My children all know each other and get to grow up together and create their own special bond together. Seeing all four of my children together, I wouldn’t trade that for anything.

Adoption should be talked about. All the time. Adoption is not a bad thing. It is nothing to be ashamed about. Adoption is a beautiful thing. Adoption is all about love and family. Because of adoption my family has grown in numbers and love, a love that crosses the oceans.

Just as my kids grow up knowing that the sun rises and sets, they know that they have a brother who has another family and has his own life path to follow, but that he is still their brother no matter where he lives.

~ Michelle

Summer Vacation Is About To Start


Summer is here. School is almost done. And my kids spend every minute they can outside. I’m not even joking, last night I didn’t get my kids into the house till 8:30pm. Since the time they got home from school we were outside. We played outside. We ate dinner outside. The kids would have probably slept outside if I let them.

All this outdoor fun is amazing. But lets face it, it means less time for me inside the house to work. House cleaning, work, blogging, all of that. Ok, the house work I can do without, but the rest… Working and blogging is my outlet. I miss it when I don’t get to do it. I need it, you know? My creative outlet is what keeps me grounded, helps with the stresses of everything and my anxiety. Don’t get me wrong, I am incredible happy to be outside with my kids playing all day. But sometimes, you just need that time to yourself to do what you crave.

My kids are my world. My whole world. They make my heart happy and my soul sing. But sometimes motherhood is overwhelming. Sometimes I crave the creative outlet to relax. And thats ok, and totally normal. Summer is here, and it is all about a new kind of balance. Trying to figure out how to get work done in the house while outside with the kids all day. Not sure how it will work, but I’m sure some how it will.

This summer I have a feeling will be different. It will be great. It will be amazing. It will be interesting to find balance for whatever whatever needs and wants.

This summer I refuse to put myself last. I will find time to work and blog and do things that are just for me. I am a mom, first and foremost, but I am still me. I still have separate needs from my kids and my whole family unit.

But in all that, summer is here, and its fun to be outside, so if its quiet around here… Well I just hope you are all outside enjoying the summer too!

~ Michelle

 

There Are Sometimes Bad Days In Motherhood, And That Is OK

I’ve been a Mom for  10 years. I have learned so much in that time. So much about myself, my husband, our kids, our family and friends, and life.


Mostly what I have learned is that not every day is a great day, and thats ok! I’m not super woman, I’m not an expect, I’m not sure what I am doing. At all. But I do know one thing that is for sure, I try my best every day.

Some days I feel like I am totally rocking this mom thing, the house is clean, meals are cooked, clothes are washed, everyone is happy and clean. And then some days the house is a mess, the baby won’t sleep, the boys argue with each other, there are mountains of laundry growing and I feel like I am failing.

There are days that are amazingly good. So good. I feel like I am on cloud 9 all day. Some days I end up crying, mostly on the kitchen floor. I’m not sure why, but the kitchen floor always seems to be the spot.

The first few bad days were the hardest. I felt like a failure. A failure as a mom is the worst feeling. As a mom I always want to be at my best, and be the best, and sometimes that just doesn’t happen.

But I learned something along the way, its ok to have bad days. Life’s balance. Good and bad. Ying and Yang. Dark and Light. Up and down.

More importantly I learned that my kids don’t care if I have bad days, because they don’t remember. What they do remember is me trying, they remember the good, the fun, they remember that despite everything I tried my best, that if I got knocked down I got back up.

I try my best every day. I may not know exactly what I am doing, or what the perfect choice would be. But I try. Every day. And if I have a bad day, its ok. Every single day may not be the best day, but there is good in every day. The sliver lining. It is there. Always. You just have to have the strength to look for it.

On the bad days I may feel like I am falling down a hole and failing, all I have to do is look at my kids, look into their eyes and I know I’m doing something right. Probably the most important thing I am doing right. I look into their eyes, and I know everything will be ok.

The bad days end, they don’t last, and they won’t be remembered. And the best thing about bad days, is that even bad days end and there is always a new day just around the corner.

~ Michelle

Summer Screen Time Rules

Yes I am a mean mom. I set rules for my kids, even in the summer. If my children think they will spend the whole summer glued to screens they have another coming!

So naturally I set out some guidelines, rules if you will. Here they are:

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Happy Summer Break!

I have high hopes for this, but also wondering if this will last past the first week if I’m going to be honest.

~ Michelle