One Step At A Time

Hello New Day.
Hello New Week.
Hello New Adventure.

HelloMonday

Oh, what will this week hold? What do I hope to accomplish this week?

I am starting this week out completely and utterly overwhelmed, filled with anxiety, stress, and I’m already tired. I want to think positive, I want to believe that this week will turn out completely wonderful. But honestly, thinking that positive just seems like a lot of work right now. But that doesn’t mean I won’t try. One step at a time. One step at a time.

So this week I decided to start writing out weekly goals again. I hope it will help me to focus, and relax, so I can accomplish everything I need to, and mostly so I don’t end up crying on the kitchen floor. (Why is it always the kitchen floor?!)

So my goals for this week:

Home:

1. Get on top of laundry. Laundry is seriously evil.
2. Nightly clean up. Some days, especially lately I am just too tired at night, but I always regret it in the morning.
3. Home cooked meals. Having home cooked meals every night helps everyone moods and not to mention everyones tummy!

Family:

4. Have more non-tv family nights. Movie nights are fun, but card game nights… those are hilarious.
5. Go for more walks. I miss walks. We haven’t go on many walking adventures this summer. And that make me sad. I like going on walks with my kids.

Personal:

6. Remember that I am only one person and there is only so much I can do in a single day.
7. Starting working out regularly. My workouts have been so random, most days I don’t have time, but I need to start making the time!

Work:

8. Focus on one thing at time. I have a million ideas, but I can’t do them all at the exact same time!
9. Clean up and organize my work space.
10. Step out of my comfort zone.

What do you hope to accomplish today? This week?

I really hope this week is a good week. I really hope my anxiety monster stays at bay. This week is going to take a lot of effort. I hope my toddler lets me sleep this week! If she doesn’t that possibility of me crying on the kitchen floor will most likely happen.

~ Michelle

Why I Do Not Eat Oreos Anymore

I count my lucky stars every day that I have never had to call 911 for one of my children. However there was one time that I should have and didn’t. And I thank God every day that nothing worse happened and that everything worked out.

My parents had taken my boys on a trip last month. That meant it was girl time for my daughter and I. One on one time with her is rare during the summer. So I looked forward to it.

We had a blast. She asked to have her nails painted about a million times. We watched movies, and had snacks. I attempted to do her hair, which she hated, but I loved. We played with dolls, trucks, built towers. Ok, I built towers, she knocked them down. It was a wonderful time.

It was wonderful, until we were sitting on the sofa together watching TV and eating Oreos that everything went wrong. She was sitting right next to me. She was right next to me. Our legs were touching. We were just watching TV. Thats when my daughter started to hit me. I looked at her. Pure horror on her face. She looked like she was screaming but no noise was coming out. Tears were streaming down her face. She was trying to get into my arms. She just wanted to snuggle into my chest. She was chocking on her cookies. My heart stopped. My first thought was “IF I call 911 they won’t be here in time. I have to do this myself.”

This was the first time I have experienced this. My instincts took over. I flipped my daughter over. She was fighting me so much. Tears still coming down her face. Her lips starting to turn colour. Her face was wrong. All wrong. I tried to flip her over and she was just clawing at me. She just wanted to be in my arms, where she knows she is safe. Pure horror on her face. She was fighting me. Clawing at me. Her eyes pleading with me. She just wanted me to hold her. I finally got her flipped over long enough that I was able to put my fingers in her mouth to see if I could get out what was blocking her air way. THANK GOD I did. I was able to get the mashed up cookie out. A sound I never thought I would be so happy to hear happened. My daughter screamed. It felt like forever. Hours could have passed, it felt like so long. But she screamed. She could finally make a noise. She screamed. My heart started beating again and I could breathe again too. My daughter still wasn’t breathing right though. I got her to throw up. She threw up 3 times, all over me, my floor, everything within reach was covered in black Oreo puke. I didn’t care. I didn’t care that my arms and chest had scratch marks from my daughter. All I cared about was my daughter. And she was breathing again, normally. She found her way back to my arms and chest. Her head finally resting on my chest with my arms wrapped around her. Tears still streaming down both of our faces. Puke dripped down my legs.

I have no idea how long we sat like that, and I didn’t care.

My daughter was breathing again. I was breathing again. My daughters lips went back to their beautiful pink colour. The horror from her eyes was gone.

I have never cried so hard in my life and I still cry when I think of what happened. That look of horror on my daughters face, her silent screaming, her lips changing colour, the way she clawed to be in my arms. I will never forget any of it. The look on her face is forever burned into my mind. It still haunts me at night. It haunts me at every meal time. It haunts me all the time.

I am still haunted by the “what if” of it all. I can’t being to fathom how close I was to my world changing.

Looking back I should have called 911. What if I couldn’t reach the blockage? What if I couldn’t get her to throw up after? What if it took too long to clear her air way? All of these were a possibility. A very real possibility. And if I had waited to see it for sure would have been too late. Thank God it wasn’t. Thank God my sweet precious girl is still here. Thank God He was watching out for us that day.

My daughter has eaten Oreos hundreds of times before this. But she hasn’t touched them since. I haven’t let her. I can’t even look at a package of Oreos at the store without my breathe catching, my heart skips a beat and I have to fight back tears.

My daughter is ok. My daughter is perfectly fine. But the horror that was on her face. The feel of her mouth around my fingers. The feeling of her clawing at my arms and chest. The colour of her lips. I will never forget these things.

Should I have called 911? Well thats easy to debate since my daughter is ok now. But in that moment. Looking back I believe I should have. IF… IF… IF something had gone wrong, if it had gone any differently, I would have never forgiven myself.

I had my daughters life in my hands, and I had no clue what I was doing, but thankfully, it all worked out.

outdoor fun

~ Michelle

Lets Talk Dreams

Hello New Day.
Hello New Week.
Hello New Adventure.

HelloMonday

Monday, lets do this. Today I am pumped. I am excited. I am hopeful. I am happy. I am blown away. Also I am a whole lot of anxious. But lets focus on the good.

I told you awhile back about my new adventure, following my dream, my new business Inspired By Five. It has always been a dream of mine to create and design jewelry. And now I am. I took the leap. Or rather my husband pushed me off the edge. Either way here I am.

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I have a small circle of friends and family. I’m a major introvert and it takes a bit for me to let someone in. So like I said, my circle is small. So I knew starting off the new business with zero money put away for any kind of advertising I would be relying on my awesome family and friends to help spread the word, and hashtags. I love hashtags. And Instagram. Instagram and hashtags are sorta of my happy place. Any who…

Yesterday I woke up and chased my kids around like normal, wrote out my grocery list, and decided to check on my social media accounts. There waiting for me was an order. Not just any order but an order for two, yes TWO Sea Glass Necklaces! Dude, I was so excited. Like happy dance in my kitchen happy. That was quickly followed by another order! 3 orders in one day. I was truly blown away! I still am.

I dreamed of this, but still in my wildest dreams I did not think I would be here. You know? Its crazy, right?

So here I am, Monday morning. The morning after. And I am thrilled. But being the anxiety filled person I am there is also my anxiety cloud following me around. Especially because I sent out a package of two necklaces, and until I know that they got to their home sweet home, I worry. It gives me major anxiety. Last week I sent out two packages and I was a wreck till I got word that they made it. I never expected to feel like this. Actually I never thought about it all. But I guess it is something I have to learn to deal with.

So right now, I want to focus on the good. The happy. The excitement. All the warm fuzzy feelings.

I also have to adult. So I have to focus on this week and my kids. I have a what seems like 37938202873893048 appointments this week. This week is all about balance. Balance of looking at the big picture of everything that has to be done, keeping track of it all, working on my business, being a kick ass mom and wife, but also just taking it one day at a time.

Deep breaths.

I can do this. I will do this. I will totally rock this week!

~ Michelle

Moms Command Centre

Its that time of year again. Back to school.
Its a time filled with mixed emotions, excitement and anxiety. But mostly for me its a time to reorganize after a summer of fun.
I want to share with you a “Command Centre” I made up a couple of years ago.
Want your own Command Centre?
Start off with a wall with a lot of space that is in a room in your house that you will be in every day. I picked my kitchen.

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Next you will need a calendar. I LOVE the Ultimate Mom Calendar. Its all sorts of awesome. It is huge so there is tons of space for writing down appointments and notes and anything else you may need to write down.

Next I find a white board/ cork board / chalk board works wonders.
Or if you are like me, all 3. Because, why not?

I found this beauty of a chalk board while out on a drive with my hubby at some handmade store we passed by. I’m in love with it.

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( I love the message the kids put on it).

Put all these pieces together, and Ta-Da! A Command Centre for the school year!

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The chalk board is used for meal lists, and to-do lists for mom and dad and to hold mail.
Calendar is for the family.
The cork board and white board at the end is for the boys. Reminders for school, pin up paper work and such.

Now to stay on top of the school year and all the kids projects, deadlines and appointments!
~Michelle

I Want To Do It ALL!

Hello New Day.
Hello New Week.
Hello New Adventure.

HelloMonday

What a whirlwind this summer has been! I can’t believe it is already August! Where as the time gone?

Summer is soon coming to an end. I have already done back to school shopping! I’ve been so busy with all the running around, errands, shopping, water fights, and such that my poor blog has been left alone. I have missed my little blog. My little slice of the internet. My escape and my release.

I don’t know what it is, but today I woke up with such determination to get so much done, and such a strong urge to blog, that I am just going with it. I must say, it is nice to be back.

Usually on Monday’s I write out To-Do Lists and goals. But today I just want to accomplish EVERYTHING that I don’t really have a list. If that even makes sense? See something amazing happened last night! My beautiful toddler actually slept all night on her own! This hasn’t happened in… well I can’t even remember when the last time she did this was, thats how long ago it was. So maybe that is the reason behind my sudden burst of energy!

Do you know what else could be behind my sudden burst of energy? My husband and I are planning a road trip in October. This will be our first real trip as a family of five! We have done Niagara Falls for a couple nights, but thats a few hours from home. This trip, we hope, will be a week long trip down to the states! I am equal parts nervous and anxiety filled, but also totally excited and over joyed!

I have a feeling today will be a great day. I will get a lot accomplished. Today will be a good day! I will make it a good day! I am not wasting my one night of sleep on a crap day!

So now to clean, organize, work, sew, make necklaces, spend time with the kids, workout, blog, read, run errands, meal prep, meal plan, and have a fantastic day!

What do you hope to accomplish today?

~ Michelle

Motherhood Has Taught Me How To Have A Good Time

There are some things I took for granted before I had kids. There for some things that I just thought were down right boring. Sometimes both of these ideas were for the same thing. Now I am a mom. I have three beautiful children. My toddler, the smallest has enough energy for 10 toddlers and hates sleep. And my two boys, they think its cool when they wake up before the sun. Oh the fun we have around here!

Blame it on being in my 30s now. Blame it on motherhood. Blame it on being completely worn out that my body screams in pain some days. But there are now things in my life that I absolutely love, that my previous self found down right boring.

So here is a list of things that I find totally lovely and wonderful. I would love to experience any one of these things on any given day.


1. Being able to drink a full cup of tea/coffee in one sitting while it is still hot.

2. Eating a meal without getting up, breaking up a sibling argument or being grossed out by the conversation my boys have. Seriously some things just do not need to be talked about during dinner.

3. Having a shower alone. Or even better yet a bath. Especially during school holidays I would really like that time alone.

4. That extremely rare feeling when ALL the laundry is done. Like I said it is extremely rare and only lasts about three seconds. Cherish it when it happens!

5. Going to bed early, bonus points if I am alone. Which now that I have a toddler that co-sleeps… that would be a never one this.

6. The ability to watch a whole movie in one sitting. Seriously. I miss this. It now takes me about 3-4 nights to watch a movie. Especially if the movie can’t be watched around children.

7. Working out. Oh how I used to take the fact that I could workout without being interrupted for granted. Or even have the time for it without having to put something else off till later.

8. Going to the store alone and getting items that were needed and without a meltdown from someone (sometimes even me!). Especially grocery shopping. Never, EVER, take three kids to the grocery store when they are hungry. Especially a toddler. Nightmare.

9. Talking to another adult without having to spell out words or read lips. Seriously. Simple conversation.

10. Talking on the phone. Ok, this one I can do without, I don’t actually like talking on the phone. In fact I hate it. But sometimes it has to get done, like calling doctors offices and such. Somehow my kids always time their meltdowns or fights for the exact moment that I get on the phone.

11. Eating candy / ice cream without sharing. Seriously. Its MY chocolate bar!

12. Having an afternoon nap. Or sleeping in. Or sleeping all night. I miss sleep.

13. Reading a book. Within a decent amount of time so I don’t have to go back and restart it because I forgot the beginning already.

Any one of these things would make me super happy. Combine a couple of them and I would be on cloud nine.

What things do you find totally enjoyable that others may find boring?

~ Michelle

Inspired By Five

I thought that being a mom would be the scariest thing I ever did. And it is. It scares the sh!t out of me almost daily. But there is something else in life that I never thought would be scary and it ended up being so scary that it held me back for YEARS! Wonder what could possible have that much power over a person, well I will tell you: Following my dreams. Seriously. I’m not kidding.

Ever since I was a little girl I have had an obsession with designing and creating. Anything from clothes, crafts, houses at one point, but mostly, always, jewelry. I used to have notebook upon notebook filled with drawers.

Then I met my husband, then we had 2 kids in 13 months. Then I started Sugarplum And Applesauce. Like I said I have always loved to create and design. I’ve always loved fabrics. The different colours, textures, all of that. But still my first passion was always jewelry. But I held back. Why? Because it absolutely, without a doubt, right down to my bone, scared me.

I have held off on my dream for years. Far longer than I should have. But then I suffered a miscarriage, then I had a high risk pregnancy. Then I gave birth to my beautiful daughter. My family was finally complete. Those events changed me. Changed me to my core. Finally having my whole family here supporting me and encouraging me finally gave me the strength to push forward. To take the leap. To jump in. Whatever phrase you want to call it.

And thus, Inspire By Five was born. You can also find me on Instagram  and Twitter.

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Now that it is here, I am still scared out of my mind about it! I haven’t fully launched it yet. But still, it is out there. Out there for the whole world to see. I feel like not only am I showing people a piece of jewelry I created, but a piece of my soul. And that thought terrifies me.

I hope you will join me on this adventure as I turn my dream into a reality.

And if you have a dream, I hope you find the strength to follow it! Don’t wait! Jump in now! When you do, I will be here to cheer you on to and encourage you!

~ Michelle